I came across a few interesting articles in the New York Times today which I have included. Some of what was presented by these writers influenced my already leaning direction towards a pessimistic reality.
THE TRUTH IS SIMPLE
I struggle to discover what I truly am in reality. As the title taken from Nisargadata suggests the truth is simple but humans take everything and make it into an untruth which is complicated. And I have become in part somewhat of an untruth.
I ask myself if in my search back to truth if my actions are a reacting to the untruth that is dominant in this life that we have created or if the problem is that I in fact can not be separate from it, its collective force bigger than me.
Sometimes I think that maybe I should relax into wearing the mask that most seem to wear and just take it all as a game. But the search that I am on and the contemplation that I am involved in constantly points me back to the truth.
All that I have become in my conditioning and every attempt to fit in under all that pressure to be something and to have has taken me from the truth. Underneath all of this and all the desire and fear there is something more simple and vital and loving and connected that is a more authentic light by what I seek.
It seems that I am being drawn into a way that I am left without all that I have known. I can’t seem to pretend that the world has not become a place that collectively is blinded by the pursuit of desire and the avoidance of fear. I see so lucidly a world where money seems to have replaced meaning for most. I don’t have the hope that helps me to engage in an optimistic way. But I can come to be in the world in a loving and compassionate way and if being in this way also involves this clear and lucid seeing of this kind than I welcome and invite this pessimism.