It seems to have been a lifelong preoccupation of mine to search for ways to be free from sufferring. When one is amidst suffering, all the wisdom that I have come by, does not seem to be helpful in removing it. Ultimately in futility I turn to my humanness as a way of more fully being with it. It seems that it is something that I am not served by separating, numbing, rationalizing, intelectualizing or attaching to it; all ways of the self. It is more a matter for me of returning to that humanness that lay before the “self”. That conditioned “self” that has in the past played such a significant role in negotiating life I now see as more of an interference than a help in this.