According to Merlau-Ponty the sensing body is not a programmed machine but an active and open form, continually improvising its relation to things and to the ever changing world. For this to occur the body must experience existence from its natural disposition and not bogged down in rigid dogma and fixed perceptions. From a practical point of view it seems to me that I can’t predict my choices because so much of that is dependent on relations external to the form that I am. Efforts to follow a programmed and/or fixed way would mean that situations are anticipated only based on what is known and can’t be truly referred to as an experience as they only obstruct my authentic being in an ever changing world.
Nietzsche captures for me, that, I have lost all sense at having arrived or that I am on my way somewhere or to becoming something. There is a lucidity about where I have come from although that journey has not been anything as mystical as I have at one time envisioned that it would be. He writes “I love those who know not how to live except through surrender, for they are on the way elsewhere.” There is no compelling sense of what I must do next or in the future, outside of the energy that leads me in choosing what path I should follow in each moment. My increased sensitivity and aversion ebbs and surges and tends to emanate from within as the guiding force in my choices. They are less cerebral and less conventional than they once were, being more about finding and settling into flow.